WindowsNT has demonstrated enormous hardware support. This is due to the user being able to add vast amounts of hardware to his/her system in order to boot WindowsNT.

Also... you have to get that 3-D rendering done, but your family wants to eat too... well, worry no more, for WindowsNT will convert your processor into a stove top!... that’s right!... Every copy of WindowsNT comes with a recipe book, pizza-oven adapter, and even utensils!

2.) Highly efficient user operations...

Thanks to Microsoft’s advanced SWAP32 API, your OS can make much better use of that large hard disk of yours. Why burden your physical RAM with that which could just as easily be placed on your fixed media? Forget about large amounts of RAM consumption, and increasing signal traffic... put it all on your HD!

And the best part is, while you’re waiting, you can get other things done, like mow the lawn, do the dishes, or even finish up that outdoor patio you’re building in the backyard!

3.) Higly efficient network operations...

WindowsNT fully supports TCP/IP networking, and not only does it support it... it improves it! Yes... thanks to the many holes placed into its TCP stacks, WindowsNT networking enjoys a much cooler, well ventilated protocol, that most tightly sealed UNIX variants only dream of. In fact, it’s so well ventilated, that any one of your friends from #warezlords, or #nukez can send you a little suprise, or drop in and say hello, to brighten your day!

4.) WindowsNT is much more friendly than UNIX...

How many times did you switch on that gosh darned UNIX box and say to yourself, “‘login’?... is that all you can say?... sometimes I wish you were more of a conversationalist, Mr. Computer-thingy.”

Well, say no more! WindowsNT has all kinds of wonderful things to say to you! When you first boot WindowsNT, it says “Welcome!”. When you make a change to your system, it’ll offer to reboot the machine for you! And when you try to touch that naughty little registry, WindowsNT will give you a friendly reminder that your current setting violates the EULA. An Operating System that looks out for you, and makes you feel like a person... how swell!

4.) WindowsNT is prettier than UNIX...

I can’t begin to count the number of times I had a problem with a missing shared library or something, only to have UNIX tell me:

Segmentation fault Core dumped

What is that?! That’s not pretty to look at! WindowsNT, on the other hand, will present you with wonderful, bright, pretty blue screens... they are indeed very pretty to look at, and look neat when friends drop by to say hello... the next best thing to a fire in the fireplace. If you like, you can reboot, and with Dr. Whutson, you can print out the pretty results, and have something to read on the toilet.

5.) WindowsNT has more applications than UNIX...

I have yet to see “First Aid” for UNIX on store shelves. Oh sure, you can spend hours downloading all sorts of software for UNIX... like it’s any good.

Think about it... the only reason people give software away, is because they know it’s no good, and that they could never sell it. I mean, lets face it... the only people who truly love computers are people who don’t know anything about them.

In conclusion:

WindowsNT is the platform of the future... there’s no denying that. UNIX is old technology, and just because something works, doesn’t mean it’s good. My WindowsNT box has been up for nearly 6 days now, with absolutely NO probl [Blue Screen]

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